Strap yourself in because you’re in for a bumpy ride – or rather, a long read 😛 I’m going to admit something pretty terrifying- This blog ‘Memoirs So Luciie’ is over three years in the making!
I feel a little bit pathetic just typing that down, because I have no idea how it’s taken me so long to finally feel confident enough to publish this site – except I do. The fear of failure and of not doing things ‘the right way’ … whatever that may be.
If you’ve already read the about me then you’ll already know a little about myself, but I thought I’d write a little Intro to me post as my very first post to let you know a bit more about who I am, what makes me tick and what’s brought this blog about.
Once upon a ( very distant) time..
I liked to believe that I had quite the exciting life growing up; Not only did I spend holidays with my dad in Turkey,where he lived ( Which became harder when I entered my anti-sun phase and cowered in the shadows in a full-black outfit – A habit that’s followed me round to this day). I lived in Pakistan for a year and then Namibia for four- While spending weekends and holidays exploring other areas of Africa by way of ‘road trips’ with my family and friends and feeling like Eliza Thornberry’s distant cousin 😛
Then in 2006 my family moved back to the UK, had years of bad luck, lost all our money, became rather pathetic ( me more than my family 😛 ) and now the most exciting thing going on in my life is… well, i’ll have to get back to you on that one!
The upside to becoming ‘ a boring old fart’ is that I spent a LOT of time daydreaming about my future.
Then…
In 2009 I bought my first very own camera, fed up of enviously looking at gorgeous photographs online and wanting to create my own little pieces of art. After moving around so much as a child i’m obsessed with memory hoarding, so it took all of bout 2 minutes to be well and truly enabled by my ‘new toy’. I wanted to capture every moment, freeze it in time and cherish it forever… Unfortunately, my partner might say- i’m still the same, if not worse now!
Side note – That’s also the year I met Rhys and the rest, as they say, is history !
Without going into all the gory details of it, I hadn’t had the smoothest sailing for the years after moving back to the UK and i’m now battling Social Anxiety on a daily basis, a crippling affliction for an aspiring people-based photographer and traveler.
I can’t actually remember the moment when my shyness morphed into social anxiety but by 2013 I was beginning to feel a bit fed up of the whole thing.
I’d always had confidence issues growing up with strangers and had always been shy yet it never really seemed to ‘affect’ my every-day life before moving back to the UK. It may have been that i’d spent lots of my childhood in foreign lands but somehow I just didn’t seem to ‘fit right’. In Namibia there were no defined lines between us kids. There were no Emo’s or Chav’s and other stereotypes ‘defining’ people ( or at-least not that were noticeable). The line separating people was , at best, extremely fuzzy along the edges.
I think it came as a shock to my system to come back to a country where everyone I met wanted to suddenly define me by putting me in a neat box.. And if they couldn’t find the right one, then they weren’t quite sure what to make of me. Turns out i’m not so easy to squeeze into a box * self derogatory joke about my weight here 😛 *
To cut a long story short – I had a hard time fitting in, maintaining long-term friendships and feeling like I belonged. On the other hand finding it incredibly easy to lose all shreds of confidence in myself. Not to mention my magically expanding waist line that was severe collateral damage from the anxiety and stress. My life just wasn’t heading in the direction i’d hoped it would be.
I decided then and there that it was time to try fight for myself!
I don’t think there was anything particularly different or special about that day. If anything I think I spent the majority of the day curled up in PJ’s on the couch watching Netflix and trying to decide if taking the bins out was worth the effort of putting on a bra… like I said, nothing special!
However, after a very illuminating evening of writing a bucket list that , over 200 points later was starting to resemble the beginning of a novel – I realized what I had to do. ( and no I don’ think I did take out those bins that night 😛 )
Since moving to Wales I never really stopped having itchy travel feet but also never fought to do anything about it.
What began as a bucket list turned into an opportunity to guide me on my own little pursuit of happiness. A journey to kick-start myself out of routine and head-first into the big ol’ scary world. If I could just live modestly, partner by my side, good food in my belly and camera in my hand capturing the people, places and food along my journey then i’d be a very happy bunny!
Here’s some surprising facts about me and my travel style though:
I am a wanderluster who is afraid of the world! – You won’t catch me skydiving, taking a leap off ‘the big swing’ or shark cage diving ( at-least not any time soon!).
I certainly won’t wow you with any amazing adrenaline-junkie fueled pursuits. But I’ve realized that’s not to say that there’s no place for me in the wacky world of wanderlusting!
If you’ve read the About Page then you’ll know I’m scared of everything; Planes, boats, fairground rides,fish…
I am merely a regular scaredy-cat with social anxiety to boot, bundling up my fears and stepping out into the big ol’ world! And that’s exactly what I did two years later, when my partner Rhys and I left our lives behind to travel around the world for a few months.
I’d love to say that everything went to plan but – do they ever?
What started as a plan for a six month adventure with elaborate fashion/lifestyle photo-shoots in every country soon became fourth months and eventually got whittled down to the skin & bones of two months sans fashion shoots. Because unfortunately, unlike me, my partner has strong commitments at home and wasn’t about to abandon them all :P.
Even now I think that we can both admit that three months would have been better but compared with what could have been none- I’m not complaining!
Now remember when I said that Memoirs So Luciie is three years in the making?
Well my original plan was always to blog my trip around the world… Lets just say that making my dream become a reality wasn’t exactly a walk in the park. By the time I knew, once and for all, that it was actually a go-ahead, it was barely two months before leaving and I threw myself head-first into all the preparations.
I was booking flights, accommodation, vaccines, buying must-have travel gear, planning routes and day trips and doing endless money-checking. 65% of my monthly wages going straight into the ‘travel kitty’. I also had to sell stuff, eat less, drive less…. but it was definitely worth it!
Unfortunately that meant that by the time it came to actually leaving I was yet to have a website I was happy with and while my original plan didn’t come to fruition – I had my first step into the world as an adult and now all I want is more.
Since returning to the UK I’ve spent every moment wanting to head back out into the world. In the meantime though i’ve moved to London, been pursuing a degree in Commercial photography and working on other ways to curb my expanding waist-line. All the while meeting my quota for foodie haven, adventuring and kicking my social anxiety to the curb step-by-step.
Hopefully Memoirs So Luciie can even help trying to get this waist line in check, with some delicious plant-based grub … Fingers crossed everyone!
No-one should be afraid of really living life – travelling exploring, wandering , no matter how socially awkward and if I can do it then anyone can!
Memoirs So Luciie is a blog that’s going to be full of my memories, travel inspiration, Plant-based recipe and living and London foodie finds and adventures. So if you’re Vegan, plant-curious or just a foodie in general then there’s something here for you hopefully. I really look forward to taking you on my journey and possibly even making some friends along the way.
At the end of the day I am a wanderlusting, hopeful free-spirit, foodie, photographer, creator on a mission to become the person I want to be and live the life I want to live. Who knows, you might even learn something about yourself along the way too!